Hey, guys. It’s me, acclaimed filmmaker Wes Anderson. I simply completed my newest film, The Phoenician Scheme, and it’s going to be nice. It’s obtained every little thing—an ensemble forged of A-listers, set designs to die for, and a mid-century setting in unique locales. However actual fast, earlier than I am going forward and launch it, I wished to ask, are you certain you’re nonetheless within the temper for considered one of my motion pictures?
You understand, with every little thing that’s been occurring recently?
I simply thought that perhaps I ought to examine in first. As a result of I might hate to launch The Phoenician Scheme, my charming and absurdist black comedy caper, just for everybody to really feel too bizarre to go see it—which, by the best way, would completely make sense. I might really feel bizarre if I had been you. There’s rather a lot in your plates in the meanwhile.
It’s okay. You could be trustworthy with me. If Benicio del Toro sporting a fez is an excessive amount of so that you can deal with proper now, you’ll be able to inform me.
However, I imply, hey, no judgment if you’re within the temper to see it. Be my visitor! Should you’re prepared to point out as much as the theater Could 30—given the state of the world—and say, “One for The Phoenician Scheme, please,” all of the extra energy to you. Possibly this 101-minute fanciful romp that includes Michael Cera as a personal tutor who speaks in a Norwegian accent is precisely what you’re searching for. It received’t protect habeas corpus or the First Modification or civil rights. However it would make you suppose, “Huh, is that an oud I’m listening to on this Kinks cowl?”
Oof. Issues certain are dangerous. Thank God I moved to Paris 20 years in the past!
Simply as a intestine examine, how about I listing off among the belongings you may see in my film and also you inform me in the event that they’re dealbreakers? Tom Hanks and Bryan Cranston rattling off my signature droll dialogue—engaging or not? What about meticulously framed scenes that mix nostalgia and melancholy with only a sprint of caprice? And do you want the thought of Benedict Cumberbatch as a personality with elaborate facial hair named Uncle Nubar? Or is that sort of a crimson flag?
Should you aren’t actually feeling one other considered one of my movies, simply let me know. All I’m making an attempt to do right here is be certain that is what you genuinely need. Don’t go simply to make me joyful. I’d don’t have any drawback sitting on the film for just a few years, if that’s what you want. Possibly I might launch The Phoenician Scheme in 2028, or 2030. However then once more, who is aware of— perhaps issues can be a lot, a lot worse by then. Possibly that is your final probability to see my work earlier than whole financial and democratic collapse.
Do you suppose there can be movie festivals within the camps?
Shoot. Now I want I’d made a film a couple of movie competition within the camps.
Don’t freak out. I’m not saying issues will worsen. I’m simply saying they may. I’m making an attempt to be empathetic, as an expat. In fact, right here in France, there are many issues too. Undecided what they’re, although. I get my information from literary magazines.
So, I don’t know, what do you suppose? You need it? You need The Phoenician Scheme? Tilda Swinton isn’t on this one, if that sways your thoughts in some way. However Jeffrey Wright is again. He wears a sea captain’s hat and suspenders. Anyway, I’ve to go now. I’m driving my bicycle to the bakery. Simply let me know by the top of Cannes. Au revoir.
